Family · Parenting · Step-parenting · Uncategorized

It’s all about the lessons

It is really funny how life works.  I started this blog about a month ago and was feeling really great about it.  Little did I know that a storm was brewing.

All it took was two weeks before the hurricane came.  Hurricane Teenager.  She washed upon our shore with Category 5 strength winds.  She had no mercy for  anything in her path.  Two weeks later we are all still dealing with the fallout.  The rebuilding process will be long and costly, and unfortunately the forecasters are predicting a lot of activity this hurricane season.

Yet instead of writing about my experiences, I sat with them.  I was unsure of what to do.  I have a love/hate relationship with books that reveal too much.  I want to eat up all the juicy tales and find solace in the truths.  But somehow when my mind wanders to how the supporting characters feel about their lives being nakedly displayed for all the world to see, I find myself cringing.

I found myself immediately faced with the big questions:  How much do I share?  How much is too much?  What if she finds this someday?  How would she feel?  After much soul searching, I have decided in this case the details are her details to share or not to share.  What it is all about is the lessons learned.

Over the past few weeks I have found myself repeatedly telling her a tidbit of wisdom that has carried me through many a tough time.  It was the greatest gift any ex-boyfriend had ever given me.  One shiny pearl of wisdom:  There are many painful, horrible experiences in life.  But if you can learn something from a bad experience, then you have the power to turn it into something positive.

Oh, the musings of a pothead.  But he was right.  There is power in reflection.  There is power in learning.  My dad told me recently that one of the many beautiful things about God is that he presents you with many opportunities in life to learn the important lessons.  If you miss the first one, another will surely present itself.  But we are trying to spare our kids the hard road as much as possible, right?

Thus, our plan for our stepdaughter this weekend is for her to spend some time reflecting and pondering the lessons she has learned over the past few weeks and is continuing to learn each day.  I thought in that spirit, I should practice what I preach.  What have I learned from this experience?  What lessons has Hurricane Teenager given me?  How can I make this painful, horrible experience a positive one?  What can I take away?  So for next few entries my plan is to share the lessons.  After all, it is all about the lessons.


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